I Promise This Isn't a Gift Guide
But I am going to talk about some nice gifts *I've* received lately <3
This season always reminds me of when Black Friday was just on Friday. My family would host Thanksgiving, sleep for a few hours, and then wake up at 3 AM to go to Walmart so we could save on flat-screen TVs and laptops to send back to our family in El Salvador. Waking up in the middle of the night, the thrill of Walmart being packed to the brim, loading up our cart with Chromebooks. We’d go back home, and then head to Macy’s and JCPenney later in the afternoon to get winter clothing. It was the perfect day as a 10-year-old.
Times have changed, and Black Friday feels like it started weeks ago. I’m also kind of experiencing gift guide fatigue. I’ve bookmarked a few gift guides here and there, I read them, I loved how thoughtful some of them are, but I’m also overwhelmed! Tbh, they’re all starting to blur together for me.
If I’m being honest, I also think many of these gift guides are more for me treating myself. Giving a gift to someone (especially someone very close to you) can be such a deeply personal thing so I find it much more satisfying to sit down and reflect on what I want to give to someone without letting a gift guide do allll the work. When it comes to me though…I love a nicely curated gift guide put together from someone who’s taste I admire or align with. Even if I’m not buying anything, gift guides can be a good source of inspiration for the future, or will help me discover a brand I hadn’t heard of before, or be a reference for finding something similar that’s secondhand.
I did write a small gift guide back in 2022 that I recently re-read. I still agree with all of my recommendations and my perspective on gifting hasn’t changed. This especially still holds:
Giving thoughtful, intentional gifts requires you to be a great listener. Throughout the year, I love to get cues from people I love. Maybe they mentioned they want to start hosting dinner parties or they’ve always wanted that one perfume or they need a new lamp for their bedroom. It’s these small snippets that can help you when it comes time for shopping for gifts…
But there’s also the element of surprise. If you know that person really well, you can give them something they’ve never brought up before but you know they’re going to love it because that’s how well you know them. And that, to me, is the best type of gift-giving.
A great gift guide can be an incredible reference point. I love it when they get really niche. Those are the most helpful! The more specific, the better. And because my algorithm knows me really well, I’ve been seeing some great guides and advice, like gifts for those who loves interiors, or more sustainable (and budget-frendly) gifts that are secondhand or handmade.
The toughest part about this season, to me, is not being lost about what to buy — it’s being intentional about why I’m buying. I’ve found myself being like “Wow, I DO need those $400 shoes because they’re 15% off!” but in reality, I really don’t. My current loafers are perfectly fine.
The other day I was about to buy a $100ish travel case becuase of an ad I’ve been bombarded with for the last 2 weeks. I saw it enough times that I convinced myself I needed it. It’s cute and has pockets to hold a few pairs of glasses. As a glasses-wearer, I needed it. I added it to my cart and my finger was literally hovering over Pay Now and then I realized, I never even wanted this until I saw this ad. It’s not going to be the end of the world if I don’t take advantage of this sale right now. It’s not going to be the end of the world if I can’t save these $15 on a $100 purchase that I actually shouldn’t even be making in the first place.
Really asking myself why I need to get something has helped me so much, because I’ve have moments in the past where I’ve impulse bought something. I’ve also been working in advertising/marketing/branding for the last 7 years as a copywriter (which means LOTS of writing for sales) and sale language still gets to me. I mean, who doesn’t love a sale!! It’s like human intinct to love a good sale. Especially for more expensive things where the savings are big, like kitchen appliances or heirloom jewelry. Just remember that if you can’t get that thing this time around, it’s okay. The sales will always come back.
Questions to Ask Yourself When Giving a Gift
What are their interests or hobbies?
What have they expressed over the last year that they want to do more of?
Do I want this gift to be something that will be enjoyed and consumed but has an end date (e.g. food items, candles, skincare)? Or do I want it to be a gift that can last for a veryyyy long time (e.g. home decor, silverware, jewelry)? (There is no right or wrong answer here! Both are great!)
What is *realistically* my budget?
Does giving this gift to this person make me feel warm inside?
Some Lovely Gifts I’ve Received Lately
To be loved is to be given gifts that feel like they’re for you! Here are just a few very thoughtful birthday, housewarming, holiday, or just-because gifts I’ve received in recent times:
Small Pleasures I’ve Treated Myself to this Year that I’d Also Give to Someone Else in a Heartbeat
Maybe this is a mini gift guide — or maybeeee it’s just my usual roundup of things for your (or someone else’s) leisure that I’ve talked about already before and want to reiterate!!!
A yearly membership at Metrograph (or any cute little theater of your choice)
An Apartamento subscription (or a Paris Review subscription, which I’m getting myself next)
A Mubi membership (I’m clearly trying to get through my movie list)
A treatment at the stunning Spencer’s Spa (I haven’t booked this yet, but it’s on my to-do list)
Old books (a tattered little old book tailored to their interests with a sweet inscription inside will forever be the most thoughtful gift)
Secondhand furniture (love a trinket, a knick-knack, a vase, a nice plate)
Homemade ice cream from Roro’s Cafe (so good, so tasty, new favorite ice cream)
I have no plans for writing an official gift guide this year, but just know that you can always message me and I will send you a very detailed list of shops and things based on what you’re looking for. The other day, someone asked me for tablecloth recommendations and I had so much fun putting together a list of some home goods stores that stocked stunning tablecloths. <3
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We love an anticonsumption gift guide 😙
This was so beautiful! I love museum dates as a gift 🎀